SQUARK IN THE WATER (why science is cool)

28 June 2014

Squark in the water! Get Quint immediately!

In which I explain to my three year old daughter why genetic science is cool. With sophisticated visual demonstrations.

SSQQQAAAUUURK IN THE WATER! GET QUINT IMMEDIATELY! AND SOMEONE FIND THE SALT AND GARLIC!

 

 


DEATH MATCH (cue my evil music, please)

26 June 2014

I’m onna flyer! I’m doing the LITERARY DEATH MATCH on July 3rd at Foyles. It’s a great event, much fun with great books. Come!

Literary Death Match, July 3rd at Foyles

DUN DUN DUN DA DA DUNN DAAA DAAA DUNNNNNNN…

Or maybe…

 

BWAH HOM.

BWAH HOM.

BWAH HOM BWAH HOM BWAH HOM BBBBWWWAAAAAH! (CHOMP).

Anyway. Come.


Summer Reading

24 June 2014

We recorded a thing at Hidden Prologues in Bloomsbury – summer reads!

I’m slightly concerned that a) I look like the guy with no neck from The Rocky Horror Picture Show and b) I may have used the word “strange” rather more often than is entirely necessary.


Author Eats… Bunny!

19 June 2014

It is an ex-bunny.

[Image under GFDL from the Horniman Museum via Cmglee]

You come home, you go to sleep, and inevitably you dream. And if you’re me and you’ve just done an event that almost always means that you dream about having done something horrible on stage and waking up to find Jessica Lambert was in the audience and saw the whole thing, so that the diary page reads:

AUTHOR KILLS PUPPY, ADMITS HATRED FOR LIBRARIANS AND BOOK BUYERS

And you did.

Yesterday evening I was at Mr B’s in Bath, and it was lovely, but that did not prevent me from worrying before, during, and after that I was about to yield to some maniacal self-destructive urge to do something terrible. It’s just part of the psychological landscape, for me, at least – and the more authors I talk to about it, the more I find that I’m not the only one.

Which is why it’s such a relief to have Jeanette Winterson.

Jeanette Winterson is in any case a god. She is amazing. Her books are breathtaking, her mind is a shiny treasure, and she is full of win. Also zing. But yesterday she took on one of the great battles of our time: she told Twitter she’d killed a rabbit and was about to eat it. Well,I say “yesterday”. Actually it was four days ago, but yesterday is when Twitter noticed properly and got cross. And lo, the sky did fall and the Heavens shake, and the voice of OH NOES was heard in the land. Because: BUNNY. She’s on the radio today talking about it.

I won’t get into the rights and wrongs of eating meat here, or the variously weird positions people who got angry with her took in order to express a baseline dislike of bunny death. I will say that what was probably a casual decision on her part has turned into a sufficiently extraordinary thing that she should be in the running for the next Turner Prize, never mind whatever literary award she scoops for her next no-doubt-brilliant book.

But more important than any of this: I went to sleep last night secure in the knowledge that even if I had screwed up yesterday there would have been no room in the rage for me, because it was all pointed at the lady who – proficiently and no doubt as mercifully as such a thing can be done, and with considered understanding of the global politics of food and having considered the ethics of consumption and eating to a depth most of her detractors will not match for a decade if they start right now – took a rabbit for the pot. And so, no doubt, will every other writer who’s on stage this week.

And that is a small but real and meaningful service to mankind.


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Drop me a line! Forgive me if the response is not immediate - I tend to get rather behind. If something requires my rapid attention, please tweet me or get in touch through my agent, Patrick.

Cheers, NH

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